Music: Kate Earl – All I Want
I’m currently reading An Abundance Of Katherines. The first John Green book I’ve read. So far it’s been interesting, I’m still waiting for it to grab me and make me pay attention. I really want to read Looking For Alaska but I don’t know if my library has it. I’ve been reading some really good books lately. I think it’s because I’ve been reading in moderation so I’ve been a little more focused on what I’ve been reading instead of just shoving it away somewhere in my brain.
I quite the book club. Only one other girl besides me was showing up and the person who was running it is no longer running it and it’s someone new who isn’t really running it that well and they changed the time that it is too so I can’t get there on that day. It’s a shame because I kind of liked being in a book club, it really made me think about the book I was reading more so I could talk about it with someone and I could state my opinions about it in a more thought out way.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about life and where I’m going and how I’m getting there. It’s been keeping me up at night. The future is such a big place, I mean you could be anything, you could accomplish anything. I guess it really makes you decide what is worth it and what is not. I need to stop being in my head so much I need to come out more.
I feel like sometimes when I come out of my head though and tell people what I’m thinking, either I burden them with my thoughts and feelings or they don’t agree with anything I say. Which kind of means they don’t agree with me. Some of it though is me just overthinking and not staying out of my head for 5 minutes.
Singing class has been the bane of my existence. But I am not quitting it because no matter how much it’s annoying me I know in the long run it will be good for me. Make me step pass unneeded boundaries I have placed up that need to be broken down.
I haven’t written a new song since FAWM. I always do this, I say after FAWM I’m going to write more and then… I don’t. I really need too because I have been having a really stressed-out-of-my-head passed few days and I need to get my boiling emotions out of me in the best possible way… Music!
I’ve been watching way to many Youtube vloggers instead of watching all of my Tv shows… Trading one vice for another. Though on the other side I am very wall versed in Youtubers, now if I could only put these talents into something that wasn’t slacking off…
I went to a booksale the other day… I got yummy books. I bought my favorite Maureen Johnson book for 25 cents. It was awesome, now I need to find space on my shelves for all of these books…
I’ve been neglecting photography… And painting… And basically anything that I should and want to do. I get to the point sometimes where I feel so overwhelmed with stuff to do that I end up not doing anything because I’m to afraid to jump into doing anything when I should just jump in because in the long run it will be way better for me.
I’ve been having trouble lately staying goal focused. I don’t know why and the past few days I’ve been trying to figure it out. My mind is a deep and cavernous place. And god it takes a long time to figure it out. I’ve just put it down to the fact that I have many reasons for the fact that I can’t stay focused on things that matter and maybe trying to figure out why is not the best possible thing I need to do now.
I think I just need to stop.
Stop analyzing every little freaking thing I do.
I just need to do.
~ Sparks Out ~
